I've been at odds with myself recently about some of the people that I consider my friends...
I realized that I always seemed to be pushing the friendship along,
I would call them and I would go visit them, etc.
But they never sought me out.
So I stopped.
And I haven't heard from them...
So what does that say?
Does that mean that they don't care?
Have we perhaps grown apart?
Because that's how it feels.
It hurts when I see status updates or tweets about places that are
literally down the block from me and I never get a call saying
"hey, I'm close to your house are you home? Let's hang."
I get that you have your own lives, and I don't expect a call everyday or even every week
but I don't know when something good happens to me or something gets me upset,
I want to call the people close to me and tell them all about it because I know they care.
For a while there it felt like I had no one to turn to..
Part of me can't even blame them, I'm not the best at calling people either, but that doesn't mean that I'm not watching and listening.
Its a sad day when I have to go to your blog and find out whats going on with your life.
or
when I ask you to lunch and you bring other people that I don't know and have no common ground with.
When did we stop telling each other, everything?
I was debating on writing this post,
but you know what,
this is my place to write down everything I'm feeling.
I'm not going to censor myself because you may or may not read this.
Fuck that.
This is not meant as a personal attack either... this is me saying
"I'm hurt and no one noticed"
I have always been there when anyone needed me,
you only had to utter the words.
Friend: A person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.
That definition of Friend pales in comparison to mine.
Friend: A person that loves you for no other reason then just being you, You can call them at 2am and they will listen to whatever you have to say. They don't judge you from doing dumb things or for being strange instead they blind you with unfiltered acceptance. You can trust them with all your secrets and they care about you when you don't even care about yourself.
*Side Note* I still love you... Despite this.
I realized that I always seemed to be pushing the friendship along,
I would call them and I would go visit them, etc.
But they never sought me out.
So I stopped.
And I haven't heard from them...
So what does that say?
Does that mean that they don't care?
Have we perhaps grown apart?
Because that's how it feels.
It hurts when I see status updates or tweets about places that are
literally down the block from me and I never get a call saying
"hey, I'm close to your house are you home? Let's hang."
I get that you have your own lives, and I don't expect a call everyday or even every week
but I don't know when something good happens to me or something gets me upset,
I want to call the people close to me and tell them all about it because I know they care.
For a while there it felt like I had no one to turn to..
Part of me can't even blame them, I'm not the best at calling people either, but that doesn't mean that I'm not watching and listening.
Its a sad day when I have to go to your blog and find out whats going on with your life.
or
when I ask you to lunch and you bring other people that I don't know and have no common ground with.
When did we stop telling each other, everything?
I was debating on writing this post,
but you know what,
this is my place to write down everything I'm feeling.
I'm not going to censor myself because you may or may not read this.
Fuck that.
This is not meant as a personal attack either... this is me saying
"I'm hurt and no one noticed"
I have always been there when anyone needed me,
you only had to utter the words.
Friend: A person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.
That definition of Friend pales in comparison to mine.
Friend: A person that loves you for no other reason then just being you, You can call them at 2am and they will listen to whatever you have to say. They don't judge you from doing dumb things or for being strange instead they blind you with unfiltered acceptance. You can trust them with all your secrets and they care about you when you don't even care about yourself.
*Side Note* I still love you... Despite this.
1 comment:
I am definitely guilty of a few things mentioned in this post. This is so weird because just yesterday I was thinking that I dont spend enough time with you anymore so I sent you a text and invited you out tonight but you never responded back. I'll give you a call instead
Oh and you had every right to post this. You cant help what you feel and it's your blog..you make the rules. I'm glad you did post it
Post a Comment